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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 20:44:44 GMT
I do hope you aren't intending to deposit number two's in your lavatory? It's not considered de rigueur by the better type of Motor Caravan owner. Number one's are permitted at night but when that happens the cassette must immediately be removed, emptied, carefully rinsed, disinfected and polished. There are many threads about not crapping in your crapper on the serious web sites, posted by serious Motor Caravanners. Also a good many think that using your shower will devalue your Motor Caravan, so don't think you can crap in there either. Really, imagine a Motor Caravan owner not knowing that. This demonstrates once again that people should be required to use camp sites. There they will encounter helpful chaps in cardigans who will be happy to provide them with written guidance on matters of such vital importance. You should also mention that every morning a serious motorhomer dusts the entire interior of his vehicle, then polishes all internal surfaces with liberal sprays of Pledge or similar, before finally hoovering the entire inside, thus fully occupying the time between clearing away the breakfast things and starting to prepare the lunch. However, really serious motorhomers do not cook anything in their motorhomes, as the sign of a used oven or hob reduces the trade in value enormously. Consequently, the latter can only use campsites conveniently situated near to a local take-away of some sort. I think I read that in MMM, or maybe OAL, sometime ago.
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Post by tugboat on Mar 13, 2014 20:46:47 GMT
Oh, Alan, FFS man. Having a dump at home you only get a splash and a wet arse. With the MH, you get a really satisfying thump as the turd lands in the cassette. It's one of the joys of MHing. Along with busting your oven door with your guitar. I Think with this yet again we have made motorhome forum history. I cannot believe that on any other forum will anyone have discussed the satisfaction one feels from the thud of a freshly laid turd hitting the bottom of an empty Thetford. I wondered for years if it was just me that enjoyed that. It is so liberating to be able to come on here finally and discuss such things openly. I feel life is sweet when the van is full of water, the solar panel is banging the amps needle against the wall, the laptop is charged and I have an empty thetford that I can drop a chocolate Soldier in. EDIT: Busting the oven door with a guitar while pretending to be The Who is not advisable. Just read that and completely lost it. I think all my limbs were flailing, which is not normal behaviour for me. The mutt was looking at me clearly figuring if it could use the phone to call the emergency services.
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Post by tugboat on Mar 13, 2014 20:50:37 GMT
We ought to have a competition at the Fruitcakes meet. See who can deposit a turd that stands upright in the bottom of the Thetford. 'Twould have to be verified by all members taking part to avoid the possibility of bribery.
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Post by twosugars on Mar 13, 2014 21:00:30 GMT
Volunteers to scrutineer please.....................anyone........?
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Post by Kaytutt on Mar 13, 2014 21:03:06 GMT
We ought to have a competition at the Fruitcakes meet. See who can deposit a turd that stands upright in the bottom of the Thetford. 'Twould have to be verified by all members taking part to avoid the possibility of bribery. TF I'm not going!
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Post by Miculo on Mar 13, 2014 21:04:56 GMT
It needs more than scrutiny, unfortunately. It needs to be witnessed otherwise how would you know it wasn't a collection of turds collected at random and planted to win the competition.
It could be a fraudulent turd, a load of crap if you like.
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Post by twosugars on Mar 13, 2014 21:09:34 GMT
You mean a tissue full of lies?
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Post by 747 on Mar 13, 2014 21:10:24 GMT
It needs more than scrutiny, unfortunately. It needs to be witnessed otherwise how would you know it wasn't a collection of turds collected at random and planted to win the competition. It could be a fraudulent turd, a load of crap if you like. Rubbish Alan.
You have obviously never tried to stand a turd on end like I have. In fact I am admired in certain circles for my perseverance and occasional success in this area.
There are two types of people, those that can and those who wish they could.
Disgusted of Surbiton.
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Post by tugboat on Mar 13, 2014 21:16:00 GMT
A torch would be vital equipment really. And a gas mask (Barry probably has loads of those in his warehouse). Maybe we should all fit SOGs in the meantime?
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2014 7:41:32 GMT
I think the idea of such a competition is an excellent excremental idea which could appeal only to a practising coprophagiac shit-sniffer like Tuggy. PS: He's also a shit-stirrer, having told everyone on MHF that he's never read a sensible thread on here and then he goes and writes this sort of filth!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2014 7:54:02 GMT
I drafted a quiz at an MHF meet and Dave something actually read out the questions as I don't\can't speak in public as I am too shy. They were so hard that not many people got any right. Must have been the worst quiz anyone has ever known.
I only got three right and it was me that created the questions.
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Post by Miculo on Mar 14, 2014 8:21:23 GMT
Frankly I find this thread disgusting. This is a motorhome forum. Detailed discussion of the lengths, shapes or disposition of pieces of human excrement have no place here. It's childish and disgusting. Grown up and, dare I say, supposedly mature people should know better. You are the kind of people who ruin our lovely hobby for everyone.
If you want to discuss filth you can start your own forum and do it there. It's no wonder so many people avoid this site with low life like you lot polluting it with such filth.
I shall be reporting your disgusting behaviour to the forum owner and insisting that every single one of you is excluded.
So there.
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Barry B'stard
Administrator
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Post by Barry B'stard on Mar 14, 2014 8:29:36 GMT
Frankly I find this thread disgusting. This is a motorhome forum. Detailed discussion of the lengths, shapes or disposition of pieces of human excrement have no place here. It's childish and disgusting. Grown up and, dare I say, supposedly mature people should know better. You are the kind of people who ruin our lovely hobby for everyone. If you want to discuss filth you can start your own forum and do it there. It's no wonder so many people avoid this site with low life like you lot polluting it with such filth. I shall be reporting your disgusting behavior to the forum owner and insisting that every single one of you is excluded. So there. Well said Alan and thanks for bring this awful fred to my attention. I shall nearly ban all of them. I bet they are also the ones who go wild camping and poo in the car park or on the beach using Dock Leaves for toilet paper (you know who you are). Disgusting.
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Post by twosugars on Mar 14, 2014 8:38:13 GMT
I would say it has some (very slight) relevance. There is nothing worse than a overfull thetford. The eternal dilemma, pull the cassette and mop up the excess in the holder, or try and bail out the excess still in the bowl with the missis's coffee mug. Is there a better suggestion ?
Not using the loo is not an option, i tried that once for a few days and just gained weight. Missis said it proved i was full of shite.
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Post by tugboat on Mar 14, 2014 8:45:41 GMT
When I was in Cornwall at Christmas and I was stuck in the van because the weather was so bad, the Thetford got fuller than intended. When I eventually pulled it out, it was so heavy that I nearly dropped the damn thing. That could have been a natural disaster akin to the Torrey Canyon had it split. I clearly need to go on a bodybuilding course.
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