ray
Fruitcake full access member
Posts: 4,188
Type of Motorhome: a tent
About you: Banned from Argos!.
Likes: 4,548
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Post by ray on Dec 12, 2013 23:12:24 GMT
Hey up.
I have come to the conclusion that certain folk who stick their chest out and announce they are full time in their vans, and the rest of us are inferior are talking Bollox. It appears these full timers go on campsites for weeks or months in a little bubble which is their pitch, this gives them the qualification to think they are superior to folk who go on shorter holidays. And they can announce they are as one with any country they happen to be in, where folk who prefer to travel through countries to take in a wider view are wrong, because unless you actually live on a camp site you can't take on a flavour of the country you happen to be in.
It's funny how they all/most have property's somewhere along the line as a safety net.
As far as I can see the only full timers are gypsies.
Discuss.
Ray
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Post by tugboat on Dec 12, 2013 23:30:12 GMT
I've only been MHing for 5 minutes and I can talk bollox till the cows come home.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2013 8:15:23 GMT
What also pisses me orf about those so-called full-timers - I wuz going to call them 'soi-disant full-timers' but I didn't think that Barry's French was up to it - is that they are abroad for over 3 months then think they can come sneaking back into the UK to get free medical treatment on the NHS.
There's one miserable cove moaning about it now on MHF or Wildcamping (or both) and a lot of plonkers are sympathising with him, the free-loading chancer that he is.
Their argument is that if you paid taxes once upon a time in the UK or if you have property here you should be entitled to free NHS treatment.
Those same feckheads seem to think that they shouldn't have to pay taxes in their adopted country, pay no Road Tax or bother with a current MOT, and that they should still get the '£200 winter fuel allowance' - and all the time they sit around in their little Brit enclaves somewhere in the sun doing nothing but getting pissed, wife-swapping and watch Brit soaps on their satellite TVs (but they're now moaning that the change in satellites is interfering with their viewing), whilst continually running this country down to anyone not bored by their continual bleating - until they discover that they need some medical treatment that will cost them a fortune abroad, so they come sneaking back her to get it free.
Oh, and those same coves are generally the type who moan about 'foreigners' who can't speak a word of the language coming into the UK and freeloading here - without apparently being smart enough to work out that's exactly what they are doing themselves.
Which reminds me, I have to laugh every time I see the comment by the know-all cove who keeps giving advice to 'Wildies' that when in France one should go to every Office de Tourisme and ask for the 'plomb de ville' - yes, he even puts it in quotes to show off his grasp of the Frog lingo. I'll bet even the Frogs laugh at that, either that or they think he is a stupid Brit scrap-metal dealer or metal thief (sorry for the oxymoron). Someone should tell the dickhead 'plomb' means lead, i.e., the stuff on church rooves or old water-pipes, and that if he wants a town map he should ask for a 'plan de ville'.
Now I'd better stop my rant here before our illustrious leader ups my fruitcake score again.
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Post by tugboat on Dec 13, 2013 8:37:58 GMT
Good rant, SeanKnackers, but a bit early in the day. I like to build up a head of steam during the day and let rip in the pm. Rant with first cuppa of the day is a bit premature, these things need savouring, donchaknow! Just sayin', thassall, not a criticism you understand, I realise you are a sensitive soul and don't want you to go into a terminal decline.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2013 8:51:44 GMT
Dear Tuggles, Your unselfish concern for my good health does you credit. However, I like to get up on a morn, have a good scratch, cough, fart, then rant violently at the rising sun (and the non-rising son too, the lazy bastard). I find that that sets the mood for the rest of the day. After all, there's no point having a reputation as a moaning old codger unless one actually moans a lot. Now I'm off to shout abuse at the neighbours.
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Post by tugboat on Dec 13, 2013 9:17:12 GMT
Just as a comparison of our respective constitutions.........I do not need to scratch of a morn cos I don't have fleas or bed bugs here at Tugboat Towers.
Secondly, I dare not fart first thing in case of accidents. A monster crap is needed before I can play rectal tunes with gay abandon.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2013 9:50:13 GMT
You want to be careful speaking about 'gay abandon' - that has a whole new meaning these days, or so they tell me.
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Post by tugboat on Dec 13, 2013 10:01:39 GMT
Hmmm, rectal and gay in the same sentence may have been unwise. I fear dementia is encr has encroached!
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Barry B'stard
Administrator
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Posts: 63,794
Type of Motorhome: A great big white one
About you: I like beer, guitar, causing trouble, avoiding work
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Post by Barry B'stard on Dec 13, 2013 10:28:19 GMT
they sit around in their little Brit enclaves somewhere in the sun doing nothing but getting pissed, wife-swapping and watch Brit soaps on their satellite TVs One can only dream of such an achievement in life!
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Post by 747 on Dec 13, 2013 18:25:23 GMT
After reading those last few posts by Seaneasy and Tugglepug, I think our first Fruitcake Wedding (well, Civil Partnership) is not far away.
I will have to start looking for a hat for the big day.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2013 18:34:59 GMT
Borrow Barry's - after all, it's already perched on his arse!
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Post by tugboat on Dec 13, 2013 21:28:36 GMT
Hey Sean-och-aye, we could be on to a good thing here. Lets make a wedding present list. Which store/Ferrari dealer should we use?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2013 21:39:42 GMT
Hey Sean-och-aye, we could be on to a good thing here. Lets make a wedding present list. Which store/Ferrari dealer should we use? We've got as much chance of getting a pressie out of this bunch of tight-arses cheapskates as Barry has of getting his big head into that silly hat of his.
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Post by tugboat on Dec 13, 2013 22:12:40 GMT
Yeah, you're right. Wedding's off, folks.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 20, 2013 18:07:33 GMT
What about the No Timers. While everyone is sodding about trying to find a hook up point and space between the trees so the sat dish will work and then having to cook a meal, then having to shower in a small cupboard, having a crap which you then have to carry in a container to a sewerage drain very often conveniently placed by the drinking water tap, I lay on a normal size bed perusing the dinner menu watching instant TV while connected to the internet with laptop and phone. Oh. And when I wake up I have a choice of breakfasts ranging from the Full Monty to a boiled egg. I know this is known as "extreme non motor homing" but I have become and expert in as much as I have to do bugger all except drive in a relatively very quiet car from a to b.
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